Lexicon. Usually used affectionately. From Steel Magnolias. A mild re-working: “You are evil. And you must be destroyed.”
You’re evil and must be destroyed
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Category Archives: Movies
“This episode was badly written!”
Lexicon. Also Galaxy Quest. An expression of exasperation. Kids today say FML, but that’s not a cute reference to a (today) 24 year old movie, so it’s clearly inferior.
“Does the rolling help?”
Lexicon. From Galaxy Quest. Sometimes re-worked to, “Does the {x} help?” where x is something odd.
“Push the button, Max!”
From Blake Edwards’ other great movie, The Great Race. Lexicon, obvs.
How to not make money in the movies
The title says it all: “How Zyzzyx Road only grossed $30.00.”
TL;DR —
Zyzzyx ran for seven days at Dallas’ Highland Park Village Theater, with a single screening each day at noon. When it closed, exactly six people had gone to see it, for a total gross of, yes, $30.
I was talking to a friend who works intricately in entertainment, and they say this wouldn’t be regarded as “released” today (unlike its 2006 run) as one now needs a minimum of 10 theaters. Possibly because of this film. So it’s unlikely ever to be… well, “surpassed” seems the wrong word. “Displaced”? — from this curious record.
“It’s my manner, sir.”
Lexicon. Only mine. From the movie Lawrence of Arabia:
Lawrence: Good morning, sir.
General Murray: Salute! (Lawrence salutes, in an offhand gesture) If you’re insubordinate of me, Lawrence, I shall put you under arrest!
Lawrence: It’s my manner, sir.
General Murray: (flatly) Your what?
Lawrence: My manner, sir. It looks insubordinate, but it isn’t, really.
General Murray: You know, I can’t make out whether you’re bloody bad-mannered or just half-witted.
Lawrence: I have the same problem, sir.
Rainbow Connection, a Benoit Blanc Joint
By way of the usually reliable Mr. Kottke comes this fun mash-up:
“Of all the gin joints in all the world…”
Lexicon. From the movie Casablanca. Once, I would have thought this was such a widely seen film I wouldn’t need to explain, but as the years go by, even societal memory fades.
Like many quotes from this movie, somewhat mangled. It should be, “Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world… she walks into mine.” The towns, alas, get dumped.
Usage: Something incredibly rare and unexpected happens.
“My god!”
”What?”
”That car that just cut us off, like an asshole?”
”Yeah?”
”It’s a Bugatti Veyron.”
(respectful pause) “Of all the gin joints, in all the world…”
Asps
Borrowed from our friends David Levine and Kate Yule. It’s a line from Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark.
Indy: Snakes. Why’d it have to be snakes?
Sallah (peering into the tomb): Asps. Very dangerous. (pause) You go first.
Usage:
“That rhino snot pie on the menu looks interesting.”
”Asps.”
(Kate died in 2016. We miss her a lot.)
Your rudder is too small
Lexicon. From the movie Titanic:
“(Captain Smith) figures anything big enough to sink the ship they’re going to see in time to turn. But the ship’s too big, with too small a rudder… it can’t corner worth shit. Everything he knows is wrong.”
Not so much a misquote, as a paraphrase. “Your rudder is too small,” means you don’t have enough resources for the task at hand. Thus:
“I really think I can learn general relativity from this Mandarin textbook in six weeks.”
”Your rudder is too small.”